Day 90/367 {Day 4 of Brinley}

Brinley came to mine and we spent the next few hours pulling on my bed. I kept rejecting his hands going on my ass though I don't want to seem easy, and also my ass is not smooth. My legs are though so it's all good. He did slight overclothes fingering that I wasnt too pleased about. Not on day 4.

I always feel vulnerable lying on a bed, and a lot of things slip past me and I don't notice. Standy-up kissing is way better than bed-kissing.

He said I'd probably last because he acts like how he did with his longest-lasting girlfriend (of 9 months). This gave me uber-mixed emotions. Jealous and hope at the same time, and I'm not a jealous person. I think I'm a perfectionist- everything I do has to be the best it possibly can. I have to be skinnier, funnier and prettier than that girlfriend goddamn it!

I think he is equipped with a large shlong. It looked (and felt) so noticable

Although the consequences of not eating a lot are starting to kick in. I keep not being motivated to work in school and I feel completely knackered when I get home. I weigh just under 9 stone though, and I think I'll freak if I get higher than that. I want to be 8 stone so I feel light for Brinley when he lifts me. That sounds totally anorexic but there you go.

Day 88/367

Brinley came round to my house this morning and we pulled on my bed loads and he lifted me up! It was so sexy it was unreal! and he like weight-lifted me like I was a weight! Nomnomnom....Finally I weigh less than 9 stone so it's all good. He had his hands on my ass and he had a boner. Ahh. I miss him so much right now, he's gone to Orkney for rugby. I'm seeing him on Monday...I can't wait so much!