I think those few days of emptiness in this blog I've been properly depressed. You only realise you've been depressed because it feels like a bubble's popped and you're eyes are open to the world and you care about yourself again and realise you are you.
So today I went to Brinley's house. I saw pictures of him when he was anorexic. It was horrible, I never even saw his bare chest or anything he had clothes on in all the pictures but it was unreal. His face ended about half a centimetre each side of his lips like were like a skull. His face didn't look like his. I cried a little bit but I tried not to let him see it.
Afterwords we talked about mental stuff and I told him about when I had my sickness phobia and wanted to kill myself in Octobor a few years ago when I was sick because I was having non-stop panic attacks.
I told him everyone has something mental going on inside them to some extent.
So after that huge talk I went to sleep because of emotional drainage and we woke up and boned and I felt very close to him.
On the way home I let out all my crying from before when I saw the pictures. The worst one was him with his 15th birthday cake, a jelly with a 15th candle sticking out and his skull-face looking at it. I cried so much I used up a packet of tissues.
So today I went to Brinley's house. I saw pictures of him when he was anorexic. It was horrible, I never even saw his bare chest or anything he had clothes on in all the pictures but it was unreal. His face ended about half a centimetre each side of his lips like were like a skull. His face didn't look like his. I cried a little bit but I tried not to let him see it.
Afterwords we talked about mental stuff and I told him about when I had my sickness phobia and wanted to kill myself in Octobor a few years ago when I was sick because I was having non-stop panic attacks.
I told him everyone has something mental going on inside them to some extent.
So after that huge talk I went to sleep because of emotional drainage and we woke up and boned and I felt very close to him.
On the way home I let out all my crying from before when I saw the pictures. The worst one was him with his 15th birthday cake, a jelly with a 15th candle sticking out and his skull-face looking at it. I cried so much I used up a packet of tissues.
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