31st May

I woke up next to that lovely boy but had to walk with him to the bus station at like 8am. Afterwords I came back and slept for about a year. Then I walked Sunny (who was bad) and met  up with Ben and Nikky and found out I got my EMAS. Woop woop! Brinley came back and I bought all my fake tan, body spray etc etc etc.

We met up with people (and this knob called Ross) and I made everyone pasta. Ross is such a dick. I asked my mum to stage a phone call to get rid of him but it was VERY transparent. I dont really care though. Asshole.

Everyone stayed for ages which was nice and I dyed my hair (which made no difference, I did leave it on for ages though but at least I no longer have roots). I LOVE BRINLEY SO MUCH. I kind of neglected him today but oh well. Saturday= Movie night and Thursday= Jess' dinner night. Much happiness.

Graph Comm exam tomorrow, sigh.

30th May

I tought Primary kiddies drama today, and that was great but very challanging.  I got such a headache

Brinley came round and we went to the gym (addicted now)

After that we went to Leah's house for AGES and talked about loads and loads and loads of stuff and I finally told someone my deep dark secret that a weirdass sac with its own blood supply came out in my period after I missed the pill for a few days. God help her if she tells anyone.

Brinley slept round, we didn't even bone we just watched the end of Black Swan and cuddled and he fell asleep. It's so nice sleeping next to someone you love.

29th May

That morning was very cold. We got up at like 7am to get some breakfast in the house. (Thank god I don't live far away.) We came back and cuddled then I got brought a muffin which was lovely then we put the tent down (I was in shorts. It was very cold.)

Afterwords we said we'd cuddle in my bed for maybe 10 minutes and slept for an hour an a half. The rest of the camping guys came in the lounge and we talked for ages which was good. After that we went to Asda and I felt the hangover coming on. I bought a Game of Thrones and a nice top and shortbreads and we sat outside on some display garden chairs.

We went to Jacob's and then went home. All good.

28th May

Today a woman had a fit. It was so scary to watch it was completely INSANE. Mum looked after her and I realised how proud of her I was just then.

I went to Jess' at 5 with my other bummers and we had a GREAT time and had a wee sesh. I got pretty darn tipsy. Nothing much happened apart from never ending happiness, and then I met  up with Brinley and I apparently would shag him there and then if he hadn't of stopped me.

I sobered up by the time we got to the monument beside our house- our camping destination. After putting up the tent there was  some rough shegging undertaken, but then we went into the other tent and played Strip Dares. Much nakedness and lesbian kissing. I was only in underwear (and a thong but that was concealed under the duvet me and a very naked Brinley were sharing), but people seen my boobs and congratulated me on them.

Afterwords we went back to the tent and slept. Brinley got grumpy because he was very cold and tired. I saved his friend William from hypothermia by letting him in our tent.

27th May

I slept in till about 3pm today in a wave of depression from yesterday.

I phoned Brinley and arranged to meet him later. I went for lunch with my mum and my cousins and it was awkward which was just dandy.

I went to Brinley's house and we're back to normal now and had  important makeup sex which was very good for him.

26th May

We had our first big fallout today. Brinley apparently told people (that I do not like) about my fabulous vibrator. Betrayal of trust. Blahblah. I cried and felt crap, he felt crap so in the end we both apologised and its all good.

It was so depressing. I had my fat day today with ben and jerrys, gillians and a rip roll. I played pokemon till about 3 because I  knew I was going to sleep in.

25th May

Gym today was good. I'm starting to become a fanatic and really enjoy it. I might even go tomorrow even if Brinley's not. Maybe.

Me and him had our first tiny fall out. I came home from the gym and slept and he got grumpy (I think) and said he should've stayed home which made me feel crap. But then I said I'm really sorry and stuff so we're all good and we had a great boning sesh that took ages and was lovely.

24th May

I went up town with Shannon and spent £30 on

Facepowder
Faketan
White shorts
Tuna wrap
Nail varnish
Juice

It's so nice going mental with money

Well I'm not a chav at all. We came back and faketanned to the max and both looked like black people.

Afterwords I saw Brinley for a bit so that was good.

23rd May

I was meant to go up town today but it was such shit weather outside I slept in till about 12.

Mum's still not on proper talking terms with me. I'm not going to cave. I meant what I said.

Brinley came round and we went to the gym and I'm starting to enjoy it, woowoo!
I've lost two balls off both my wrist piercings. Meh.

So we came back and chatted for ages about pubic hair and he gave me a massage and we talked about sex and getting pressured. I realised that I had been pressured with the Ex. It left me with a weird feeling.

I've eaten between 800-900 calories today and my stomach's making funny noises. I'td be better if I ate between 600-800 but oh well. I'm getting an 18 calorie icelolly.

22nd May

I went to my Granny's for lunch today. My grandad's starting to really forget things. It's heartbreaking.

Dad finally bought me a TV today- it's HUGE in my room! 22inch with a DVD player. Mega chuft! Not so chuft I can't get music channels though. Agh!

I saw Brinley for like half an hour when his mum went to Tesco. Loveage.

I took a raj at mum because she bought a huge pack of kitkats and ate 4 strawberry tarts. I called her selfish because we're going to Canada in less than 2 months.

Ugh. My guidance teacher once said that obese people eat themselves to suicide. I think that could possibly be true.

21st May

Brinley took me on a date to see Pirates of the Caribbean today. I spent about an hour laborously cutting out hearts of chicken and ham and cubing vegetables to put on skewers for his tea.

I wore this high waisted 50's skirt and pearls. Now that is making an effort. Brinley said I looked the gorgeousest he'd ever seen me.  POTC was good I didn't understand it too much it's not as good as the last ones.

So we came home and ate tea and went upstairs and cuddled like, loads and lay on my bed and had slow, romantic sex which was lovely. I love him so much. I never knew I could love anyone as much, it's insane.

I'm on a bit of a downer right now though, I've just eating LOADS. Ughhh, want to puke but I'd freak out. And I don't want to become bulimic.

20th May

I woke up next to that tidy boy. It was lovely. We had a hugely long boning session which my sister (who decided to dye her hair white and now looks like Draco Malfoy) probably heard but oh well. We went to the gym and I got crazy endorphins which was great.

So we came back and slept for a bit on my bed and I had a very fast shower and we met Shannon and went to Brinley's gig.

They played bad because the singer wouldn't sing and this other boy kicked him out the band, in front of everyone which I thought was pretty mean. He would get grounded for a month anyway for coming out to play which is a shame. All the way through Brinley playing I checked him out. Nom.

Mum keeps going on about when he was anorexic and today I finally asked her to shut up about it. She said I've started to obsess about food since I've gone out with him. It's only been the last three days. I ate like a pig today, anyway.

19th May

I didn't do anything all day. Then in the evening I went to the Youth Cafe and made friends with a bunch of people I dont know, one of which was hot.

Brinley got paranoid about the guy who I thought was hot (I didn't mention what I thought of him even so). It feels nice to be jealous of.

Brinley slept over which was nice because we ate and talked and boned a bit and I had a dream about the polish boy who spanked my ass ages ago.

17th May

My sister's back home again today. Groan. I woke up and CBA-ed doing anything but I showered and fake tanned and felt better.

I went to Jacob's and revised and Brinley came round and him and Jacob played some Xbox and we went to Tesco's to get tea. Brinley hadn't eaten anything (I don't know how's the best way to react to that) so I bought him chickens and hams from Tesco. I'm gonna dye my hair red/brown/ginger soon. Woowoo!

Drama exam tommorow. Bricks have been shat.

16th May

I think those few days of emptiness in this blog  I've been properly depressed. You only realise you've been depressed because it feels like a bubble's popped and you're eyes are open to the world and you care about yourself again and realise you are you.

So today I went to Brinley's house. I saw pictures of him when he was anorexic. It was horrible, I never even saw his bare chest or anything he had clothes on in all the pictures but it was unreal. His face ended about half a centimetre each side of his lips like were like a skull. His face didn't look like his. I cried a little bit but I tried not to let him see it.

Afterwords we talked about mental stuff and I told him about when I had my sickness phobia and wanted to kill myself in Octobor a few years ago when I was sick because I was having non-stop panic attacks.

I told him everyone has something mental going on inside them to some extent.

So after that huge talk I went to sleep because of emotional drainage and we woke up and boned and I felt very close to him.

On the way home I let out all my crying from before when I saw the pictures. The worst one was him with his 15th birthday cake, a jelly with a 15th candle sticking out and his skull-face looking at it. I cried so much I used up a packet of tissues.

15th May

Me and Shannon didn't really do a lot all morning, watched Scooby Doo, Fingertips and some other kid's tv, I had a shower and fake tanned, ate cate, cleaned up. I felt sick and tired and headachey. Is that a hangover? Possibly.

Mum came home and was uber tired and Dad kept being bad so I had to throw him out even though he'd bought us tea. (Which I didn't feel was very fair that I had to do even though it was mum who wanted him out.)

I watched pokemon and did bugger all for the rest of the day and phoned Brinley for ages (who is sitll rubbing in I double booked him yesterday with Shannon when I already said I would see him) but I'll see him tomorrow so it's all good.

Day something

Haaaaha I drank vodka and squash. Its great. I havnt been doing my blog for ages. Dont worry Il do them. Thsi is greatttttttttt. So I dressed up for Brinley today. Yayayaya he liked it good bonageings. Sleepoving with Shannon and made a chocolate cake

Great timesss

Day 131/367

Biology exam went a lot better than I thought it would. I wore a skirt. Big mistake. Buttdances, visible-butcheek scares and goddamn THONGS (no VPL). Ugh. Stress.

Brinley came round and it was all good. I keep getting really emotional after boning. I feel like I'm not perfect. Chubbs, ingrown hairs, the lot. It's great. I'm getting a headache from mums bug too. Great fun.

Really CBA with the exam tomorrow, modern studies. Ughughugh.

Day 130/367

Exam stress has finally sunk in. I kept almost crying when Brinley and Jacob were over. Depressiveness FTL.

Mum took us out to lunch (I had a sandwich and Jacob had a cake. Brinley didn't have anything)

I have a major crush on a girl right now. It's great.

I hate jealousy. Theres this girl Alice who's friends with Brinley and from what he's said I thinks he fancies him (Crotchal hugs, playing the nervous game, going to 'rape' him at the camping tonight.)

She's way skinny aswell and people say she's got a good body.

Ragin.

I pierced my wrist. It was super.

Day 129/367

I wrote about an old man who had seen a Nazi in the English Writing. It was great. Not. The reading was really really REALLY hard so I'm hoping for just a 2.

Brinley came round and he was very fit. I went to my friends party and it was pretty good, think retro party-games and stuff.

Afterwords I walked to the park with him and got whistled on the way and felt vulnerable. Brinley and me had a good romantic walk around the pond in the park which was super.


OH GOD. I FORGOT I WAS ON WEBCAM TO HIM AND CLEANED BOGEYS OUT MY NOSE. FML FML FML FML FML. Praying to JEBUS that he wasn't watching. Spew in my mouth so much.

Day 128/367

We woke up at 10:30 and did loads of english revision. I showered and felt better.

Brinley came round later and we had possibly the best sex so far. It was lovely and romantic and I came 4 times. I felt guilty towards mum though. I've been not a very nice daughter recently.

English tomorrow and I'm shitting bricks. Wanna get two 1s.

Day 127/367

I didn't understand any of the maths questions in Credit. I ate 7 chocolate bars today and estimated I ate around 4000calories. It was great.

We went to see brinley at the gym in our school uniform but he wasn;t there and it was hurna embarrasing.

I'm such a caveman. Everything's hairy. It's great.
Shannon slept round on my floor which was decent.

Day 126/367

I was on FIRE at maths tutor today. I felt really bad for her because she'd been doing maths all day with everyone and she had to take headache pills.

I imagined when I saw Brinley he'd want to bone so I invited Jacob over to cockblock. This worked pretty well. I'm pretty annoyed at Brinley because even being wanted all the time feels hot it makes me feel like he only wants me for sex.

I told him that on MSN and he was worried I was mad at him and I said he has to be able to tell better when I'm not in the mood so it's all good now.

Maths exam tomorrow. Great fun!

Day 125/367

I wanted to stay inside all day today but I got pressured to go outside by Brinley. We met up with some other friends and went on the pedalos in the park.

We came home and boned loads. It was great until my sister called me to say bye to my dad and I had to hug him when I was commando under my shorts and tshirt. And sweaty and dishevelled. Then Dad wanted to shake my hand...the same hand I'd been tossing Brinley off with. Oh dear.

Mum said I felt very hot and should keep hydrated.

The sex wasn't as good as it could've been because we couldn't make any noise.

Day 124/367

We got 5 hours sleep today. I had chocolate for breakfast.

We got home and did some damn good boning until my mum came home. Brinley's a positions virgin so he's getting educated. Because we couldnt make noise he was going to come on my boobs but missed and came in my eye and up my wall instead. It was so UNCOMFORTABLE! It didn't sting as I expected it would but it made my eye go well red.

After he left I slept for about a year.

Later my friend who I'm pretty wary of (she's got a friend-with-benefits and flirts with EVERYONE including Brinley. FML.) was like 'Have yous done the dirty!?' I don't know who told her. I don't mind people knowing but I just dont trust that girl not to twist it or something if I do tell her.

Day 123/367

Today was good, me and Jacob came round and I shoved my hair in this weird topknot coming out of my head to make volume and toothpaste on my spots and then Brinley came round suddenly.

Ugh.

I put makeup on and we went to cooper park for a bit and then on the way back we met up with Brinley's band and they all came round to my house and we had an amazing fajitta and doctor who sesh. Owen, the band's vocalist gave me a crotchal hug, and specifically made another guy hold his guitar so he could hug me. Hmm. We did have a Muse bonding jam with me on piano and him on guitar though. And I said he looked awesome earlier today because he had a fedora and glasses. He's not hot and I fancy the pants off Brinley (literally).

Everyone went home apart from me and Brinley and we fell asleep on my bed and then went to Jacob's for a sleepover....We boned a tiny bit in the night...not even fully in but a teaser for the time when we properly bone.

I ate like a whale. I'm suprised I'm not fat.