Day 1/367

So.
Here it is.
Day 1 of 367 days.

I didn't really do anything wondrously interesting today. I went to Tesco and bought 2 slices of 300+calorie cheesecake slices and ate them both

Had a conversation with the Ex about going on holiday somewhere. For some stupid reason I told him I wanted to go on holiday somewhere and was willing to take anyone who wanted to come. He texted me saying he would ask his friends to come on the holiday! Shock horror! This was not my intention to have him having some mega time with all his COD-obsessed boy mates whilst I feel fat and alone. Grr. Currently want to punch that boys face through that glass window.

I've decided this holiday should be females-only.
I hope my female friendies would like to come, but most of them don't have the capacity to save up money.
Me and Shannon are going up town tomorrow on Tidy Patrol and then perhaps trot around in heels and revealing clothes on New Years Eve, or alternatively do facemasks and watch the countdown to 2011. It's so scary that its New Year tomorrow tomorrow! My life is flashing past! It was only New Year 2010 yesterday!

Hey, that's a reason for keeping this blog for a year: life goes too fast. You have to record the things you love.

The Commandments

1. Thou must keep a blog for a year

This could be the hardest commandment to achieve out of all 7. The longest diary I have ever kept was when I was 11, it had receipts from Pets at Home and a bit of parsley from a cheese sandwich stuck in it. But maybe, just maybe, I will remember to care for and nourish this blog if I set blogger as my homepage instead of my faithful friend Google.

2. Thou must refrain from gluttony, and get a sexy body

A sexy body like Lady Gaga (underneath her meat dress and insane outfits she secretly has a good body.)

I have been blessed with 30E boobies also my flab kind of goes in the sort of right places (Thighs, butt and back-muffins.) However, a whole-body slim-down for myself would be very nice. I want to be able to walk without my thighs touching together. This would be very very nice for when the summer when not a lot clothes are required. Much as I normally dont like my overlarge boobs, and much as I dont not like being vain, I think they would look good in a bikini with a newly-toned body on a beach somewhere sunny.

3. Thou must be more confident in thyself

I can get paranoid about thinking about what people think of me. I get also become shy around meeting new people (ESPECIALLY PEOPLE I FANCY. NO MATTER HOW MANY TIMES I TELL MYSELF, LOOKING AT THE FLOORAND MUMBLING REPLIES IS NOT SEXY) I want to be one of those people who everyone seems to love to be around-you know the type- the ones people make facebook tribute pages about.

4. Thou must find love or get a sexy time

Since turning 16, the legal age of consent, I have had zero sexy times. Prior to this, I have had illegal, underage (and technically paedophillic) sex no less than 76 times. In 2011 I want to find the Guy Of My Dreams, or perhaps a holiday fling (is that a bit desperate? You only live once though). I don't want 2011 to be a year of barren romance having my sexy underwears lurking sadly in the back of a drawer.

5. Thou must not be unkind to thy neighbours and not bitch

The sad fact is, the more you bitch the more you get bitched about. I want to break this cycle and become a Nice Person. Apparently some study claimed bitching releases the same endorphin things as orgasming does. Maybe that's true, bitching with someone does indeed feel good. But being a Nice Person is the G-Spot to feeling good.

6. Thou must work hard in school and pass thy exams

I have no crazy-intense plans to become a doctor that requires straight As. If I fail I would only feel like a failure in myself, as it would be about 9 years of education wasted. So I must bite the bullet and do what I'm completely and utterly shite at: revision. Revision for me is not achievable as homework. Homework has a clear beginning and end. Revision is just a never ending tunnel of darkness. My prelims are after the Christmas holidays too.

7. Thou must travel in the summer holidays

I have never been abroad with an exception of a funeral in Ireland. This year I'm saving to go somewhere sunny on a package deal and flop like a pussylicious whale on a sunbed and watch tidy foreigners go by. So far I've saved up £210. Commandment 7.5 is to Not To Spend Money On Stupid Stuff such as magazines and food.

The Beginning

I plan to keep this blog for a year. 367 whole days. That's gonna be some task for me. My record time for keeping a resolution was three weeks. Every day I'm going to make a post, for 367 days (started two days before New Year)

The first thing you're meant to do in a diary is describe yourself, I'd say I'm pretty normal but that's a matter of perspective. Normal for some people is going on family holidays to Florida each year and eating peanut and jam sandwiches and having hair that stays perfect all day.

I'm 16, I live in minor poverty with a mum with depression. I go to a public school in which people drop doorhandles down 6 floors of stairs. School's mostly great though.

The main people in my life:

Mum- is a bit crazy, lets me do whatever I like (she would let me skive school every day or do drugs.) I have a very close relationship with her though which is great.

The Ex- boyfriend of 1year and 2 months. Broke up in October 2010. Have had lots of history and am still have feelings of love-hate for him. Weird relationship still going on. One second want to kiss him and then want to punch his face through glass.

Eilidh/Shannon/Jacob/Jess/Robyn- my main homies.


The Commandments
1. Thou must keep a blog for a year
2. Thou must refrain from gluttony, and get a sexy body
3. Thou must be more confident in thyself
4. Thou must find love or at least, a sexy time
5. Thou must not be unkind to thy neighbours and not bitch
6. Thou must work hard in school and pass thy exams
7. Thou must travel in the summer holidays